Smelling of the cinnamon on her fingers
Knit with soft yarn and verses of her prayers
A cushion against the world and its weathers
My cozy armor
Note: I only followed the syllables rule. Feedback welcome.
Smelling of the cinnamon on her fingers
Knit with soft yarn and verses of her prayers
A cushion against the world and its weathers
My cozy armor
Note: I only followed the syllables rule. Feedback welcome.
You gave me cinnamon and quiet recitation and an unwritten clacking of knitting needles. Our mothers really are a quiet comfort. I feel my shoulders relax whenever I hear my mother clear her throat. It’s such a small sound, but I would notice it on the quietest afternoons and it was home.
Thank you, Nate.
This piece just feels like comfort. How lovely to have that sweater from your mother!
Thank you Michelle.
Your last line does such a good job knitting together the first three, and your title telegraphs what’s coming. People often forget how important the title is to give context. And then the tactile and olfactory details in between really make the poem work. (I’m 2/3 of the way through a sweater for a friend’s child, and am hoping it gets this much love)
My only two little quibbles would be 1) watch out for words like “prayers” when you’re syllable-counting for poetry, because one widely used regional pronunciation is “prairs” which gives you only ten syllables in that line, and 2) the third line feels awkward, maybe because the first two are “it IS” and that one is “it DOES” so it almost feels like the verbs aren’t working as well. Does that make sense?
Thank you Rowan for your very helpful feedback.! Didn’t realize “prairs” and “prayers” are both acceptable pronunciations and I’ll change the beginning of the third line to “a protection” or “a shield”. Thanks again!
I enjoyed all the words that relate both to protection and comfort: such a great picture for a sweater and a mother, which both do both!