So much for Tooth Fairy and Santa Claus

“My tooth is wiggly”, my son declared emerging from the bathroom, soon after finishing his toothbrush-and-toilet ritual that night with his dad. “What did you do to him, did you brush his teeth too hard”, was my instant reaction, directed towards the dad. The nightly protocol of brushing-and-toilet is strictly enforced by me, so mostly I get that done, just to ensure that its not conveniently skipped.
“I didn’t do anything”, my husband was obdurate, defensive.
And then I asked the kiddo to open his mouth wide in a ‘AAAAAAA’ and peeked into it, to estimate the damage. And, behind the wiggly tooth was a sharp white thing emerging, like the tip of an iceberg. It was the new tooth that was pushing out the old one!!
So, it was time for him to loose his teeth and for the permanent ones to come.
“Google, is that okay?” and Google told me that its between 5 to 7 years that children loose their teeth, so not to worry.
Then finally after a couple of days, the loose one came out and I assumed it would be a little painful for him, but he squealed in delight, “Now the tooth fairy will give me a gift.”
Tooth Fairy, what the heck is that!! There are no tooth fairies in our country where we lost our teeth. So, again our savior Google told us that you have to keep the tooth under the pillow at night and the tooth fairy replaces it with money or a gift. Not again!! Christmas has just gone by when we spent a fortune on buying him toys and the old fat Santa Claus took all the credit. And now again, burn a hole in your pocket and let the Tooth Fairy get away with it!! We are targets of a cabal plotted by these characters. Undoubtedly, all these elves and fairies are just robbers in disguise, who fill their bulging goody bags from the parents’ pockets.
Anyway, we did put the tooth under the pillow and sneaked in later in the night, to replace it with some cash and the kid was sure delighted in the morning, though he doesn’t do any cash transactions yet, neither buying something, nor selling our stuff .
The second tooth he lost when we are sailing on the ship on our cruise vacation. And he applied all his logic and wisdom and came up with this – “We can’t put the tooth under the pillow tonight because the tooth fairy doesn’t know that we are on the ship, she can’t find us, lets save the tooth till we reach home.” And we did that.
But that’s just not the end of it, we are also subject to questions about what the tooth fairy does with the all the teeth. I was trying my tiny little wits, and I was thinking more like a woman, that she colors them and makes jewelry out of them and does good business, but thankfully his dad told him that she gives the teeth to other kids who need them, who have gaping holes in their mouths.
So much has that tooth fairy occupied his brain, that last night he told us that we, the parents, have tooth fairies at work, who give us the money when we go to work.
How I wish that were true, I would give my tooth and nail and limb, if someone could just sneak the booty under my pillow, without me toiling for it.